5 Fun, Nontraditional Ways to Decide Who Goes First with Vows

Your wedding day is a beautiful celebration of love, and when it comes to exchanging vows, the question of who goes first can add an element of excitement and anticipation. At Provenance, we believe in helping couples and their officiants create personalized and memorable wedding ceremonies. Below we'll explore five fun, nontraditional ways to determine the order of vow exchange, adding a touch of whimsy to your special day.
Table of Contents
  1. Intro

Your wedding day is a beautiful celebration of love, and when it comes to exchanging vows, the question of who goes first can add an element of excitement and anticipation. At Provenance, we believe in helping couples and their officiants create personalized and memorable wedding ceremonies. Below we'll explore five fun, nontraditional ways to determine the order of vow exchange in front of your friends and family, adding a touch of whimsy to your special day.

  1. Rock, Paper, Scissors: If you and your partner are up for a playful challenge, settle the vow order with a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors. Take a moment to engage in this classic hand game, and the winner gets to choose whether they want to go first or second. This interactive approach adds a dose of friendly competition while creating a delightful memory for you and your guests.
  2. Flip a Coin: Bring a little bit of chance into the mix by flipping a coin. Assign one side of the coin to each of you—for example, heads for the bride and tails for the groom. Toss the coin into the air, and whichever side it lands on determines who goes first. It's a simple yet exciting way to leave the decision up to fate. You can also choose a coin that has significance to you, whether it was a family member's, given to someone at a special time, or a custom one made for the wedding.
  3. Love Trivia: Put your knowledge of each other to the test with a love-themed trivia game. Have your officiant ask a series of questions about your relationship, and the person who answers correctly gets to choose the vow order. The questions can range from sentimental to silly, creating a delightful and interactive moment that showcases your bond.
  4. Jenga Challenge: Have the officiant set up a game of Jenga (perhaps with already missing pieces, for expediency) so that you and your partner can play live in front of your family and friends. NOTE: there will be cleanup involved, so it may not be an ideal game and you'll want to plan accordingly.
  5. The Alphabet Game: Let the alphabet be your guide! Have both you and your partner draw a letter from a hat. The person with the letter closest to the beginning of the alphabet goes first. For example, if one of you draws an 'A' and the other a 'P,' the person with 'A' will have the honor of sharing their vows first. It's a lighthearted approach that adds an element of surprise and fun to your ceremony.
  6. Thumb War: Engage in a classic thumb war battle. The winner decides the vow order, whether they prefer to go first or second.

You can use the Provenance Ceremony Builder to easily add nontraditional, fun ideas like these into your ceremony script. And if you need help crafting your vows, check out the Vow Builder.

Your wedding day is a beautiful celebration of love, and when it comes to exchanging vows, the question of who goes first can add an element of excitement and anticipation. At Provenance, we believe in helping couples and their officiants create personalized and memorable wedding ceremonies. Below we'll explore five fun, nontraditional ways to determine the order of vow exchange, adding a touch of whimsy to your special day.
Start Writing VowsGet Started with provenance
Open article

Is Universal Life Church (ULC) Legit? Here's What You Should Know

Dive into the legitimacy of ULC and discover if using them to get ordained online is your best route to officiate weddings.
Open article

PRESS RELEASE | Provenance Announces Official Partnership with Mindy Weiss

The renowned event planner declares that an extremely personalized wedding is one of the biggest wedding trends for 2024, and Weiss formally joins innovative tech startup Provenance as an advisor to help users personalize life milestones.
Open article

Incorporating Family and Friends into Your Wedding Ceremony

Discover creative ways to incorporate family and friends into your wedding ceremony. From readings and rituals to special acknowledgments, make your day unforgettable with personalized touches.
Open article

Crafting Your Perfect Atheist Wedding Ceremony

Discover how to plan an atheist wedding ceremony that reflects your values and beliefs. From vows to non-religious rituals, create a unique celebration of love.
Open article

How to Write or Officiate a Wedding Ceremony | For Couples & Officiants

If you're not a professional officiant or clergy (or if you're a couple having a friend or family member officiate), odds are you could use some help on how to put together a wedding ceremony and where to even start. The Provenance team has been in your shoes, so we put together this comprehensive guide that includes a timeline, checklist, tips, and so much more for all of the unofficial officiants officiating a friend of family member's wedding (say that three times fast!).
Open article

Unique Wedding Ceremony Favors to Delight Your Guests

Discover creative and unique wedding ceremony favors that will surprise and delight your guests. From personalized gifts to eco-friendly options, find the perfect way to say thank you on your special day.
Accept cookies? View our Privacy Policy for more information.