5 Fun, Nontraditional Ways to Decide Who Goes First with Vows

Your wedding day is a beautiful celebration of love, and when it comes to exchanging vows, the question of who goes first can add an element of excitement and anticipation. At Provenance, we believe in helping couples and their officiants create personalized and memorable wedding ceremonies. Below we'll explore five fun, nontraditional ways to determine the order of vow exchange, adding a touch of whimsy to your special day.
Table of Contents
  1. Intro

Your wedding day is a beautiful celebration of love, and when it comes to exchanging vows, the question of who goes first can add an element of excitement and anticipation. At Provenance, we believe in helping couples and their officiants create personalized and memorable wedding ceremonies. Below we'll explore five fun, nontraditional ways to determine the order of vow exchange in front of your friends and family, adding a touch of whimsy to your special day.

  1. Rock, Paper, Scissors: If you and your partner are up for a playful challenge, settle the vow order with a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors. Take a moment to engage in this classic hand game, and the winner gets to choose whether they want to go first or second. This interactive approach adds a dose of friendly competition while creating a delightful memory for you and your guests.
  2. Flip a Coin: Bring a little bit of chance into the mix by flipping a coin. Assign one side of the coin to each of you—for example, heads for the bride and tails for the groom. Toss the coin into the air, and whichever side it lands on determines who goes first. It's a simple yet exciting way to leave the decision up to fate. You can also choose a coin that has significance to you, whether it was a family member's, given to someone at a special time, or a custom one made for the wedding.
  3. Love Trivia: Put your knowledge of each other to the test with a love-themed trivia game. Have your officiant ask a series of questions about your relationship, and the person who answers correctly gets to choose the vow order. The questions can range from sentimental to silly, creating a delightful and interactive moment that showcases your bond.
  4. Jenga Challenge: Have the officiant set up a game of Jenga (perhaps with already missing pieces, for expediency) so that you and your partner can play live in front of your family and friends. NOTE: there will be cleanup involved, so it may not be an ideal game and you'll want to plan accordingly.
  5. The Alphabet Game: Let the alphabet be your guide! Have both you and your partner draw a letter from a hat. The person with the letter closest to the beginning of the alphabet goes first. For example, if one of you draws an 'A' and the other a 'P,' the person with 'A' will have the honor of sharing their vows first. It's a lighthearted approach that adds an element of surprise and fun to your ceremony.
  6. Thumb War: Engage in a classic thumb war battle. The winner decides the vow order, whether they prefer to go first or second.

You can use the Provenance Ceremony Builder to easily add nontraditional, fun ideas like these into your ceremony script. And if you need help crafting your vows, check out the Vow Builder.

Your wedding day is a beautiful celebration of love, and when it comes to exchanging vows, the question of who goes first can add an element of excitement and anticipation. At Provenance, we believe in helping couples and their officiants create personalized and memorable wedding ceremonies. Below we'll explore five fun, nontraditional ways to determine the order of vow exchange, adding a touch of whimsy to your special day.
Start Writing VowsGet Started with provenance
Open article

Most Popular Wedding Readings from 2023-2024

One of the main ways couples are personalizing their wedding ceremonies these days is through the readings and rituals they choose to include (or leave out). Some couples take the readings part of the wedding ceremony as a time to highlight their culture or religion. Others opt to spotlight their favorite author, movie, song, or even just a random passage about love that really resonated with them. Tens of thousands of couples have used Provenance's tools, and below you'll find the most popular readings and rituals selected:
Open article

How to Choose Wedding Readings

Our lives are marked by significant life milestones that define the cadence of our lives. For millennia, generations before us have similarly commemorated these critical moments. Traditionally, a wedding is an opportunity to honor your cultural or religious heritage, carrying forward the torch of tradition for whichever cultural or religious tradition you may inherit.
Open article

Everything You Need to Know for Your Marriage License

Navigating the path to marriage often begins with one of the most pivotal steps in wedding planning: obtaining a marriage license. This essential document not only legalizes your union but symbolizes the start of your lifelong journey together. Whether you're tying the knot in a grand ceremony or opting for a more intimate celebration, understanding the ins and outs of the marriage license process is crucial. From knowing when to apply to ensuring you have all the necessary documentation, this guide aims to simplify the process, making it a memorable part of your wedding planning journey. Let's delve into the details of how to seamlessly integrate this legal requirement into your wedding plans, ensuring that your focus remains on the joy and love that brought you together in the first place.
Open article

Questions The Officiant Should Ask the Couple

Officiating a wedding is a tremendous honor and challenge. It requires an investment of your time and self, and you will want to do a great job. You do not want to say ‘yes’ to officiating the wedding unless you feel ready for the commitment, and you also want to make sure the ceremony and vision aligns not only with the couple’s expectations, but also with what you are able to give. By asking the below questions, you can ensure that this will be an experience that is incredible for everyone involved.
Open article

Who Says Their Wedding Vows First?

At the core of the wedding are the wedding vows, encapsulating the essence of a couple's love and commitment to each other. In this blog post, we'll delve into the question of who takes the lead in the exchange of vows, offering insights and tips on crafting the perfect vows for your special day.
Open article

House Announcements Your Officiant Should Make During the Ceremony

Learn the essential house announcements your officiant should make during your wedding ceremony, including guest seating, logistical details, and post-ceremony instructions. Create a seamless experience with our expert tips.
Accept cookies? View our Privacy Policy for more information.